I wish that cricket would be quiet. It’s daylight for heaven’s sake.
I can’t help but feel like every post I post should be serious and insightful since I’m trying to reach other people like myself and get them interesting in my writing.
But, being a serious writer blog is just a bit difficult to me because I’m always concerned about what I should say, what am I allowed to say, will that come back on me. Being myself for some reason doesn’t come into play.
I should get it out now. Sometimes I say and think strange things. Not only do have an odd thought process and an interest in some weird things, I am also a diagnosed schizoaffective disorder sufferer. However, I don’t see it as an excuse for how strange and weird some of the things that come out of my mind are. As i said, I have strange interests.
So what even is me blogging?
I thought about making this extremely serious. I’m supposed to be a horror author, a writer at best. Every post should be well thought out and deep and reflective for the passing reader to say “hmm…never thought about it.”
But then I have the urge to post something silly like there’s a cricket only I can hear in the window that goes on for hours and all I can do is glare in its direction until it decides to stop. But, based on the things I’ve been reading lately, (memoirs and the like) I’ve found that attempting to be deep isn’t enjoyable to anyone, attempting to write something mildly philosophical or at the very least a meditation on writing is honestly boring and a bit pretentious. But when they get silly, make fun of themselves, and admit to a certain humor about their journey that’s when it become deeper, realer.
Plus it’s more interesting.
So, I’ve decided I’m going to say whatever I feel like saying. I plan to be just as odd as I am because that’s how I’ve always been, the weird girl with that other weird girl who hangs with those weird people. I may never get a single following support because of it, but I can say I was myself and never tried to be what I’m not.
With that in mind, that cricket is back and he needs to start paying rent.
-Harli V. Park-